story sketch: catching the fehinnan weapon
Wednesday, May 2nd, 2012 11:44 amThis is a sketch of what was voted by readers of Karen Wehrstein's Philosopher in Arms to be Chevenga's coolest move in the Arkan war. After another battle lost to Chevenga's army, a fleeing Mahid has thrown a Fehinnan weapon, a delicate sphere which, if shattered would release a deadly gas, killing rider, horse, and anyone else unfortunate enough to to be close enough. Chevenga barely manages to catch it intact when his horse helpfully rears up and throws him off...

previous version:

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previous version:

This picture is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License, and may be freely used under the terms of that license with a link back to mikaspace.net Please see terms of use for details.

Click to sponsor this sketch and support the artist!
Feedback and contributions of any amount are greatly appreciated :)
Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 01:02 am (UTC)Move the horse a little to the left and/or inverse Chevenga to the right... you'd be able to show more of the horse so he'd be that much more distinct. I think I'm seeing a foreleg there, but it takes a bit to figure out, whereas if even just a bit more of it showed it would be obvious.
Little costume detail I forgot to mention: when he's carrying a shield, he has his shortsword slung on his left hip, for a right-handed draw in case he loses the longsword.
My cartoonist's instincts are saying his face should look way more alarmed, but... well it depends on whether you're going for humour or impressiveness. If it were a photo the expression would be about that, though I think he'd have his mouth a little open.
Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 01:25 am (UTC)Which would you prefer for the expression? It's still early, so it's easy enough to make changes!
Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 02:09 am (UTC)Suggested addition--in the background, the group of fleeing Arkan horsemen (including the Mahid... who's looking back to see if his gambit worked, of course.) They don't have to be all that distinct.
Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 02:19 am (UTC)Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 02:31 am (UTC)The horse's head and Chevenga's helmet plume being cut off -- is that part of the composition or an artifact of scanning?
Version the First is already posted on my site. (http://chevenga.com/node/1252)
Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 03:19 am (UTC)Thanks for the signal boost!
Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 09:10 am (UTC)Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 09:12 pm (UTC)Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 09:38 pm (UTC)Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-07 09:40 pm (UTC)Re: Compositional feedback
Date: 2012-02-08 12:18 am (UTC)