meeks: meeks and lorelei (Default)
[personal profile] meeks
This is a sketch of what was voted by readers of Karen Wehrstein's Philosopher in Arms to be Chevenga's coolest move in the Arkan war. After another battle lost to Chevenga's army, a fleeing Mahid has thrown a Fehinnan weapon, a delicate sphere which, if shattered would release a deadly gas, killing rider, horse, and anyone else unfortunate enough to to be close enough. Chevenga barely manages to catch it intact when his horse helpfully rears up and throws him off...



previous version:


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Compositional feedback

Date: 2012-02-07 01:02 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Hi Meeks, it's me (Karen) with a suggestion:

Move the horse a little to the left and/or inverse Chevenga to the right... you'd be able to show more of the horse so he'd be that much more distinct. I think I'm seeing a foreleg there, but it takes a bit to figure out, whereas if even just a bit more of it showed it would be obvious.

Little costume detail I forgot to mention: when he's carrying a shield, he has his shortsword slung on his left hip, for a right-handed draw in case he loses the longsword.

My cartoonist's instincts are saying his face should look way more alarmed, but... well it depends on whether you're going for humour or impressiveness. If it were a photo the expression would be about that, though I think he'd have his mouth a little open.

Re: Compositional feedback

Date: 2012-02-07 02:09 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Well, his eyes look pretty intense so I bet if you had his mouth open enough to show a little tooth it would be perfect.

Suggested addition--in the background, the group of fleeing Arkan horsemen (including the Mahid... who's looking back to see if his gambit worked, of course.) They don't have to be all that distinct.

Re: Compositional feedback

Date: 2012-02-07 02:31 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Ah. I was wondering what that squiggle was doing there. I should have guessed.

The horse's head and Chevenga's helmet plume being cut off -- is that part of the composition or an artifact of scanning?

Version the First is already posted on my site. (http://chevenga.com/node/1252)

Re: Compositional feedback

Date: 2012-02-07 09:10 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
All digital? Cool! Curious, can you tell me what your rig is?

Re: Compositional feedback

Date: 2012-02-07 09:38 pm (UTC)
karen_wehrstein: Pencil sketch of Chevenga by me --> Oil painting for book cover by Larry Elmore --> FaceGen sampling and editing by me (Default)
From: [personal profile] karen_wehrstein
Just to claim responsibility: all comments up to here on this thread that are not Meeks's are mine.

Re: Compositional feedback

Date: 2012-02-07 09:40 pm (UTC)
karen_wehrstein: Pencil sketch of Chevenga by me --> Oil painting for book cover by Larry Elmore --> FaceGen sampling and editing by me (Default)
From: [personal profile] karen_wehrstein
I have managed to do my digital art without a Wacom, which possibly is stupid. Software of choice, Corel PhotoPaint.

Re: Compositional feedback

Date: 2012-02-08 12:18 am (UTC)
karen_wehrstein: Pencil sketch of Chevenga by me --> Oil painting for book cover by Larry Elmore --> FaceGen sampling and editing by me (Default)
From: [personal profile] karen_wehrstein
I think the plume being cut off on the bottom works okay, the horse's head being cut off at the top, less so. I guess because it's an important part of the horse. You could also maybe show the white of the horse's left eye... I think... (can't know without trying it).

O_O

Date: 2012-02-07 03:30 am (UTC)
ysabetwordsmith: Cartoon of me in Wordsmith persona (Default)
From: [personal profile] ysabetwordsmith
Your grasp of photogenic scenes, unique angles, and the use of perspective continues to amaze me.

Poor Chevenga, he's everyone's favorite punching bag.

My Favs coming together!!

Date: 2012-02-07 03:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-tasylov-er.livejournal.com
Eeeeeeeeeee I Just Love when my favorite things come together! Meekie and PA are going to make a good match :D

Meekie one thing I would say but would want Karen to weigh in on is the wristlets, I always envisioned them as having a lip to catch the sword strikes on... kinda like a flattened u... ummm or how to say... a rolled edge on them... not only of blocking but to give an extra Umph for striking with.... the actual chapter escapes me but I recall something about Esora-e "striking Cheng in the temple with the lip of his wristlet"

Other then that which is a "My head vs your head idea" technical things...

his fingers seem... stubby? IDK maybe it is just cus they are a touch blurry but they seem to be flat not curving around the ball or arching out from it... but I know what a PITA hands are... Hmmm ah it looks like they are shortened after the arms seem so stretched out.

the other one is probably cus of the lack of color but it is hard to tell where the wristlets leave off and vambraces start up.

Fan

Re: My Favs coming together!!

Date: 2012-02-07 06:04 pm (UTC)
karen_wehrstein: Pencil sketch of Chevenga by me --> Oil painting for book cover by Larry Elmore --> FaceGen sampling and editing by me (Default)
From: [personal profile] karen_wehrstein
Okay, now I'm official - have a Dreamwidth account so my comments don't have to get spambot-screened. And you can also see from my av that Meeks's version of Chevenga's face is right. Is there a way to claim all my "anonymous" comments?

Re the wristlets, they do have a lip but I see them in the image; Fan, maybe you're imagining something a little different?

Re: My Favs coming together!!

Date: 2012-02-07 08:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-tasylov-er.livejournal.com
hmmm I guess I was thinking the lip would be wider... that or I just am having a hard time seeing the ends.

Date: 2012-02-07 04:23 am (UTC)
clare_dragonfly: woman with green feathery wings, text: stories last longer: but only by becoming only stories (CM: Reid: bounded in a nutshell)
From: [personal profile] clare_dragonfly
Yay, it is awesome! Wow, what a dynamic scene, and you captured it really well. I mean, I knew you could do it, and I'm still impressed ;)

I was thinking the horse looks a little weird, and that his mouth should be open, but you already got that from Karen! I'm also thinking his fingers (including thumb) all look the same length? That might look better just with the lines cleaned up, though.

Your sixth comment!

Date: 2012-02-07 02:11 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
This comes from Karen's friend Melissa. She just sent me this link. This is awesome! It so totally captures how Karen talks about this scene. And Chevenga, what I can see of him, really looks like Chevenga! Completely! If I were to make any little suggestion (and it really is little, as I *love* the stunned look of concentration on Chevenga's face), it would be to have the darkest part of the drawing at the focus point of the sphere/hands (and Chevenga's eyes, of course) and then progressively grey out Chevenga's body and horse, so that the eyes are drawn to that dangerous sphere.

All the best with this! And your art career!

Melissa

Another thought

Date: 2012-02-07 06:57 pm (UTC)
karen_wehrstein: Pencil sketch of Chevenga by me --> Oil painting for book cover by Larry Elmore --> FaceGen sampling and editing by me (Default)
From: [personal profile] karen_wehrstein
Chevenga has really good definition, especially at this very physical phase of his life... you don't have a lot of places to show it, a bit on one arm and his thighs, but possible you can take inspiration from this pic? http://news.deviantart.com/article/157246/#/d2tisnt.

Re: Another thought

Date: 2012-02-07 09:43 pm (UTC)
karen_wehrstein: Pencil sketch of Chevenga by me --> Oil painting for book cover by Larry Elmore --> FaceGen sampling and editing by me (Default)
From: [personal profile] karen_wehrstein
Hahahahahaha, I bet it does. Try this one - I think it'll give you the image I meant. http://rust2d.deviantart.com/art/Man-Nude-Seria03-Rikardo-170518169

Date: 2012-02-07 11:43 pm (UTC)
aldersprig: an egyptian sandcat looking out of a terra-cotta pipe (Default)
From: [personal profile] aldersprig
the upside-down-catching-the-globe is awesome; I love the movement of the piece.

Yay! Revision!

Date: 2012-05-02 09:54 pm (UTC)
karen_wehrstein: Pencil sketch of Chevenga by me --> Oil painting for book cover by Larry Elmore --> FaceGen sampling and editing by me (Default)
From: [personal profile] karen_wehrstein
Ah yes, there is the retinue with the Mahid, thundering away triumphantly thinking they've knocked off that pesky wool-hair.

And you've fixed his legs... I think maybe he needs more distinct signs of fingernails on the right hand, though, so as not to look like an Arkan.

So now what do we have to do to inveigle you to do colour?

BTW in my own art world, I decided to do all my own e-book covers and have two of them done... anyone who wants to see them, go here for Book I and here for Book II. I decided I couldn't go on using the mouse for painting so I went out and bought myself a Wacom Bamboo Create tablet. I'm enjoying it so far though I'm finding it takes some getting used to.

Re: Yay! Revision!

Date: 2012-05-02 10:26 pm (UTC)
karen_wehrstein: Pencil sketch of Chevenga by me --> Oil painting for book cover by Larry Elmore --> FaceGen sampling and editing by me (Default)
From: [personal profile] karen_wehrstein
A year of donor access - you mean upgrade to patron, so you see the premium content? Sure!

I just whipped off a little correction to a face with the tablet... aaahhhhhh.... would have taken me three times as long on the mouse... and I'm only just learning to use it.

Sorry I forgot to mention, the composition with the horse is better, his head not cut off and all of him further to the left so you can tell his foreleg is a foreleg, etc. His left ear looks a little big, though. Is that a faint smile I see on his face? "Ditched the idiot, phew" ;-)

Date: 2012-05-03 03:11 am (UTC)
clare_dragonfly: woman with green feathery wings, text: stories last longer: but only by becoming only stories (Default)
From: [personal profile] clare_dragonfly
Ooh, I like the horse a lot more now. And tiny horses in the background! :D Though, hmm, the horse's front leg looks off. And I really wish we could see more of Cheng's expression, but that would be hard to finagle, what with that helmet.

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